What Would Jane Austen Do?

We went to the Houston Mini Maker Faire last month. The kids had fun. Papi and I were SO excited about it. We planned everything in advance--maps and tickets loaded on our phones; clothes and backpacks laid out the night before. I was expecting there to be a massive crowd, because it was going to be full of fun and educational stuff, but it was definitely not overwhelming. Their loss! Personally, I was mostly interested in the food trucks: Monster PBJ , Coreanos , Waffle Bus , Bernie's Burger Bus . Monster PBJ has, hands down, the best graphics. Becca requested a Classic PB + strawberry jam on white with sliced strawberries and Nutella, cut into FOURTHS thankyouverymuch. She would not so much as let me look at it until she got bored with eating it. I can confirm that the crust was tasty. I was really looking forward to trying Coreanos, but I was a little disappointed in what I got. It turned out to be one of those humongous burritos that can't even fit in your...

The Karate Kid The kids were soooo into it. Emmet kept calling the bad guy a "jerkwad."

I have this nail polish on my toes right now. It's making me so happy to look at it, I even went totally crazy and did my fingernails, too. Not my hand. Via . Yes, it is ridiculously expensive, but it's not like Becca's going to college: "Rebecca continues to struggle with appropriate school behavior. She has a discipline referral form in her backpack today. She was sent to the office for yelling in the hallways during STAAR testing. While in the office, she attempted to hit another student to “get some payback for [her] brother.” She then ran out of the office without permission when a parent opened the door and she thought she wasn’t being watched."

The PTA had a Valentine Dance fundraiser on Friday night. Emmet's "date" was another fifth grader, Sarah. She was on the t-ball team I coached years ago. She's also a member of the junior geological society. But here's the killer: she was so excited when she told me that she was wearing the lip gloss and the perfume she got for Christmas. OMG HOW CUTE IS SHE?! Speaking of cute...Becca went solo, but she looked adorable, and I think she had fun. At dinner, after the dance, she showed us her new moves--the Chicken Dance and the Electric Slide.

I tried this new nail stuff: NutraNail Gel Perfect UV-Free Gel-Color . I honestly think it's superglue. At least, that's what it smelled like. And the results? Not good! I followed the package instructions on my right hand, and these instructions on the left. The polish looked okay, though it was a bit streaky, and maybe not as shiny as a salon manicure. Unfortunately, immediately after I washed my hair two days later, all the polish started chipping off. It was obvious that water got underneath the polish. Also, in spite of already being perhaps 50% chipped off, it was still a bit of work to get the rest of it off. Pros: at $12, it's cheaper than a Shellac manicure Cons: at $12, it's still a waste of money.

Papi had to hurry and finish his turkey leg before the Birds of Prey show started. Man, I love the Texas Renaissance Festival. We go every year with the kids. In the interest of public service, here's my list of Best Practices for the festival.   [1:21 video from School of Sword] Buying a ticket: This year there was a pretty good offer at Urban Dealight ( sic )--something to keep in mind for next year. If you try to buy on Craigslist, you won't get much of a discount, and it's usually people selling free passes they got in a pack. I used those one year, and they worked, but they made me awfully nervous.  If you've missed getting another deal, try to buy the tickets from one of the retail outlets (HEB, Woodforest Bank) or buy them from the website (where there is a "convenience charge." GRRR.) They are more expensive at the gate. This past weekend set attendance records--something like 42,000 on Saturday and 27,000 on Sunday. The lesson here is go...

Babe Didrikson Zaharias would be 100 years old today. She was the greatest American athlete of the early 20th century. She was a basketball champ; she held world records and Olympic medals in track and field; she was even a competitive billiards player and bowler. At the age of 24 she took up golf, then she founded and dominated the LPGA. She's still the only woman to ever make the cut in a regular PGA tournament. Babe Zaharias was from Beaumont. She was my hero when I was a kid. A couple of weeks ago Becca picked up an old biography about the Babe and started reading it. It's really a shame the Babe isn't better known today -- but you can fix that. Earlier this month a new biography about her came out that you should read. Happy birthday, Babe!

I was helping Emmet get dressed one morning -- pull-on pants, no-button shirt, slip-on shoes, etc. -- when we had the following exchange: Emmet: Mom, did you know that light isn't really matter? It's really just an idea, even though it can affect matter through radiation... (continues in this vein for a while) Me: Go to the potty, Emmet; we'll talk about particle physics when you're done.

  So, this is what I made the little heathens for their April Fools' lunch:  The white things are boiled eggs I put into Japanese egg molds The orange things are "carrots" I carved out of cheese and topped with rosemary sprigs. I am the Michelangelo of processed cheese. The "berries" are little candies from the bulk bin at the grocery store. I think they're jellies covered in nonpareils. Then there is the dirt pudding (chocolate pudding covered with crushed chocolate wafers), complete with buried gummi worms. Perhaps most evil of all, I opened those bags of Lays and replaced some of the chips with dried apple slices. Vitamins! NOOOOOO!

with the Saint Arnold's car Took Becca and a friend to the Art Festival on Saturday. Here they are posing with the Saint Arnold Brewery tie-dyed Bentley. BTW, Saint Arnold released a new Divine Reserve today that is supposed to be a big deal. I'm not an IPA person, but I mention it as a public service. You're welcome.

...is over now, sadly, though we had some good times. I went to Austin last weekend -- not for SXSW, but with my mother, to see some painted churches and go antiquing. [Anyway, I'm too old, fat and uncool for SXSW. I can't even work all the shit on my Blackberry. Although I am sorry I missed Jack White covering Buddy Holly .] The Clio garden at Bayou Bend was beserk with azaleas. This past week was Spring Break. Papi and I were both off, but we stayed in town and had a great vacation. We took the kids to the Children's Museum (and I did not die of boredom, though it was touch-and-go for a while). We also had a picnic in Hermann Park, hung out at the neighborhood park, went to Bayou Bend and the petting zoo. We planted some seeds and played in the yard and also just laid around a lot. And, for the record, I got my taxes done. YAY ME.

Signs that I might live in the best neighborhood in Houston:  1)Last night at a tour of the middle school, the PTO president pointed out that it's the alma mater of both Patrick Swayze AND The Undertaker . 2) the box from the local pizzeria ( Pink's ) has an art show print on it.

I just posted this in a comment at Apartment Therapy, but I wanted to mention it to you, too: image via Amazon When Becca had her surgery in December, she came home with Steri-strips over the incision. After enough time had passed and the Steri-strips were starting to come off, we used Tea Tree Oil to get them completely off. I think it would also work to take Band-Aids off with less pain and yelling. [FYI: It's also really good for shaving and for cradle cap.] My friend Cayce told me the best thing of all about Tea Tree Oil: look for it in the black haircare section of the drugstore. It costs about half as much there as it does in the hippie section of the store.

[Posted in response to Sarah , with apologies in advice: this turned out to be a damn dissertation.] Usually I'm put off by bloggers who post recipes saying, "OMG this thing I made was the best thing EVER!"  So I won't claim that this chili was spectacular, but I can tell you that I tried a new method this year and was pretty encouraged by the results. I had always used ground beef for chili, because that's what my mom used, because that's really the easiest thing.  But lately I've converted to the Church of Chunked Beef, and I'm not looking back.  I also added a secret ingredient this year, which will be revealed below. Since you didn't ask: I am unfamiliar with the use of any kind of produce in the making of chili.  Fresh onions, tomatoes, etc. have no place here.  And I will not even discuss beans.  If you want to move to Russia and pledge allegiance to Stalin, that's your business. So yeah, the recipe: 2 lbs. pot roast (i.e. chuck ro...

My parents' Halloween costumes.  You should know that 1) my dad is an engineer, and 2) my mom has never worn nail polish, ever, in her entire life.

home row, yo , originally uploaded by houston mamacita . I tried this nail polish, and I like the color. Sometimes it looks brown, sometimes gray. You know, greige . It's by Essie and it's called Merino Cool. Men seem to hate it, which is a sure sign of its coolness. And no, I can't straighten my middle finger. It's crooked like that all the time.

Today is my 35th birthday. I'd like to take this opportunity to announce my candidacy for President of the United States.  Don't worry, there's a cabinet position for all of you who contribute big bucks to my campaign . So here are my qualifications:   1. My hair can get very big!   2.  I completed a semester of law school!   3.  I can practically see Mexico from my yard! As for my platform, I'm still taking suggestions. Leave yours in the comments.

E&B plotting the latest weather shenanigans in the gulf. When I was a kid we did this all the time, but I guess no one does it any more. It's actually kind of hard to find out the storm coordinates now [try here ]. The kids were having so much fun we looked up the charts for a few historical hurricanes, too. Today is mine and Papi's 14th wedding anniversary. This is what happens when nerds mate.

"You can't take rejection personally. You have to say, 'Well, that dumbass just didn't know any better.'" Words of wisdom from the Sausage King of Plainview.