Yippie Ki Yay—It’s Blog Action Day

Today is the day we all write on our blogs about what we’re doing to help the environment. You know I love me some meme, so I wanted to contribute with
Eleven Things I Do for the Environment:

1. Instead of turning out the lights when I leave a room, I never turn on lights at all. I have night vision eyes.

2. I don’t drive a car; I don’t even ride a bicycle. I levitate to get from place to place. Suck it, DiCaprio.

3. I don’t use any packaging materials – at all. In fact, I use telekinesis to buy books from Amazon.

4. I have no carbon footprint. I created global warming all by myself, with my intensely hot body, but I am so cool that I’m chilling it down as we speak.

5. I don’t have to recycle – I incinerate garbage with laser beams from my eyes

6. I make love not war.

7. I wear fair trade, sustainably harvested edible panties.

8. I’m not just donating today’s profits from my blog to an environmental charity – I will pledge every cent this blog has ever earned to that little albino koala himself.

9. I lay my own eggs.

10. I use my own milk for butter.

11. I am a smug twat.

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