Don't Give to Jerry's Kids (and other bile)


1. Stupid fucking Jerry's kids stole Becca's doctor. I called to make an appointment for her today, and found out that her neurologist, who I liked, has stopped seeing epilepsy patients because he is now focusing on MS and MD patients. I immediately concluded that it's because those showboat cripples have their own telethons and raise more money than epilepsy patients do. So the next time a firefighter asks you to help "fill the boot," tell him to go fuck himself.

2. I had to go to Wal-Mart today (Target was closed), and the lines were epic, even by Wal-Mart standards. [Fools! The "Express" line is NEVER faster.] Anyway, I tried to take a picture, but it didn't come out. Did you know that you can get kicked out of Wal-Mart for taking pictures? This would be a new record for my family -- my mom has only been kicked out of a Target. [Note: I did not poll my sister, Peetie.]

3. My friend Katie's mom sent her an email today. The subject line was, "What you miss by not going to church." The body of the email was empty -- as in, you miss nothing. I am amazed that mothers send their grown daughters email to discourage church attendance. I think the stork dropped me off at the wrong house.

4. However, I might need to take my kids to Sunday school eventually. We were at the MFAH on Sunday and I pointed out a Frida Kahlo painting called Moses. I was trying to show the little urchins some of the features in the painting, and I said, "You know, the story of Moses? He went down the river in a basket?" Blank looks. They're never going to pass art history.

Comments

  1. A friend of a friend was trying to get her daughter enrolled in a catholic elementary school. They had an interview with the principal, Sister so and so. The young girl looked up as the nun was speaking, pointed to a picture of Jesus and said "Who's that guy?"

    ReplyDelete
  2. Oh that sucks about the doctor!

    When he was three Jasper somehow got it into his head that Santa delivers baby Jesus via Fed Ex.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Thanks for giving me another reason to hate Jerry. As if the Martin/Lewis feud wasn't enough.
    Hang in there Mamacita!

    ReplyDelete

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