Touched for the Very First Time

Like A Virginis one of the Friday Five today at Amazon, meaning that it's a mere $5 to download. Which is nice if, say, you once developed a twirling routine to the title song, only to be cruelly shot down from performing in the fifth grade talent show, because you hadn't even known what a virgin was, and your parents watched you practice the routine over and over without pointing out that the principal and the music teacher might have some reservations about the music.

Comments

  1. OMG- did that really happen? How horrible! That is so "Little Miss Sunshine!" Superfreak!
    Nowadays, 5th graders get their periods. I've been invited to a "Red" party for an 11 year old this weekend to celebrate the onset of her menarche. Does anyone know the protocol for these type of celebrations? Do you think Madonna's "Like a Virgin" be a good gift? Or should I bring a large container of advil? Box of kotex? I could fashion the pads into some nametags for the guests I suppose...

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  2. To Mer: Holy Cripes! A "Red" party?! Maybe some dangly earrings made of...oh, never mind..

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  3. Wow, that is awesomely funny, not to mock your childhood trauma. A girl in my 5th grade class definitely did an inappropriate dance routine to "La Isla Bonita" and in a Catholic school no less.

    P.S. - That red party idea is "oversharing" in party form. Crazy.

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  4. YOU ARE MAKING THAT UP, MER. Please please tell me you are making that up. How HORRIFIED would you be? Holy lord. I really have to think about a present for that. Is it a Surprise Mortification Party or is the honoree in on it?

    P.S. Yes the "Like a Virgin" is 100% true.

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  5. Mamacita,
    I have one question---did they let you get to the end of the 5th grade "Like a Virgin" dance number that you worked so hard to practice? Or did they not even let you get on the stage? I'm hoping and praying you were able to get up there, at least for a little while, before they pulled the plug and squashed your spirit.
    BTW, I think I'm older because for me, it was "Le Freak" by Chic that I worked up a dance number to. But I date myself...
    Sadly, it's the red party thing is all true. At first when it said "Red party" I simply thought some eccentric friends had turned communist. These are unusual economic times, after all. Then I read the fine print on the invitation and it is indeed a party to celebrate a "feminine rite of passage." Yes- the honoree is in on it. And I have to go! They came to my daughter's b-day last weekend. So any gift ideas are really appreciated!! HELP MEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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  6. I have to crash this dialogue as Mer turned me onto Mamacita for a quick glimpse of gift options. My directions to simply not go to the Red Party ignored. . . I was sent home from Kindergarten after wearing hot pants for show-and-tell, it was 1970. . .I've been scarred my whole life from it.

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  7. Joanna -- That is too awesome. If only you had a pic. Superfreaky!

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