What mamacita is ...



I've nursed a crush on P.J. O'Rourke for almost two decades now.

Watching


The next time I get a movie from Netflix and Letitia says, "Oh, Mike and I loved that movie!" I think I'm going to return it unopened.

He's a lovable slob! Who majored in philosophy! He likes Josie and the Pussycats! He's good with kids! He and his friends dress like 15 year-olds! They make up zen koans about sex!

No one in this movie can act his way out of a paper bag, and the combination of book-jacket philosophy and 1998 fashion is more than my senses can take. Furthermore, I have to disagree with Roger Ebert: every line in this movie was entirely predictable. There has never been a less-sexy movie. It made Flipper look like an erotic thriller. F minus.

Comments

  1. Jealous BitchSeptember 9, 2009 at 8:13 PM

    PJ O ROURKE IS MY PERSONAL HERO/ICON/WORDGOD. He is the funniest thing ever.

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Reading/ Watching/ Listening

 Reading: The Rules of Civility by Amor Towles. I didn't like it nearly as much as A Gentleman in Moscow . In fact, I liked it only barely enough to keep reading. Watching: Poker Face , on Peacock. Papi and I have enjoyed watching this, one episode at a time, and not every day. It's a little formulaic, but the sets and the guest stars are fun. I like that it changes scenery every episode. Listening to: The Beatles Channel, Sirius XM. Ever since watching Get Back , the Beatles documentary, I've enjoyed listening to them with new ears.
Read more

The Bikini Wax: An Internal Dialogue

God, this is horrifying. I wonder if she's as embarrassed as I am. OW! Ow MOTHERFUCKER! Okay, this hurts less than childbirth, but only because it doesn't last as long. What is she saying? I wish I spoke Vietnamese. I think I outweigh the entire staff combined. Dude, where is she going? They need a picture on this ceiling. They would probably put up a picture of Hannah Montana. I will not think about Miley Cyrus. I will not think about Miley Cyrus. Hey, I bet my nails are dry. I wonder if the liquor store next door sells ice. Next time I'm paying more for a place with numbing cream. Which is worse -- being her or being me? OW. Me. At times like this it's good to have some poetry memorized. 'Twas brillig and the ... the ... Dammit. HOW BIG IS MY VAGINA? She could have mowed the back 40 by now. God, how come nobody told me this shit was growing halfway down my leg? Did I water the clematis last night? Next time: vodka first. Next time: Vicodin first.
Read more

Be Awesome for Halloween

Image
You are a total hoser if you don’t dress up for Halloween. Granted, I haven’t dressed up in a few years, but I am about to change that this year. I have an idea … but it’s a surprise! Actually, I have lots of Halloween ideas. I’ve put together a few sample ideas for some of my favorite bloggers. If you find yourself in need of inspiration, send me a link to your blog, or just describe what you’re doing on Halloween night, and I’ll give you a hand. Emily and Rob : Alice and Ralph Kramden ! Soletrain : ODB . Wouldn’t you pay money to see Uncle John wearing a grill? Anyway, I’m sure he already has the outfit. He just needs to accessorize with a 40. Bunny Tomerlin : Goth princess . Because I bet she’s never even worn PVC. (Polyvore set via Haley ) Grosgrain Garage : preppy Jesus – Bonnanos, tunic with gingham trim and a ribbon belt, pearls worn as a thorny crown Megan: Now that she's succumbed to making wreaths , Mega...
Read more