Thursday, September 3, 2009

Even Bigger Momma

I'm here to give you bad news: there is going to be a sequel to Big Momma's House 2. But I'll let my personal hero, Amelie Gillette, take it from here:

Since 2006, Martin Lawrence has dutifully risen everyday at 8am, marched into his temperature-controlled walk-in closet, and Febrezed "Big Momma," the bulbous fat suit he wore in Big Momma's House and Big Momma's House 2: Wider Load. "Maybe today we'll get the call," he'd whisper to the fat suit, while lifting up the mushy belly and spraying underneath. "And when they do, we'll be all fresh and ready to go, won't we, Big Momma? [in high-pitched Big Momma voice] Sho' will, Martin!" Then he'd toss the now empty bottle of Febreze into the trash, and head off to Best Buy to buy more copies of Madea's Family Reunion and Madea Goes To Jail DVDs to pile in his driveway and run over with his car.
Go read it.

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