The Bikini Wax: An Internal Dialogue
God, this is horrifying. I wonder if she's as embarrassed as I am. OW! Ow MOTHERFUCKER! Okay, this hurts less than childbirth, but only because it doesn't last as long. What is she saying? I wish I spoke Vietnamese. I think I outweigh the entire staff combined. Dude, where is she going? They need a picture on this ceiling. They would probably put up a picture of Hannah Montana. I will not think about Miley Cyrus. I will not think about Miley Cyrus. Hey, I bet my nails are dry. I wonder if the liquor store next door sells ice. Next time I'm paying more for a place with numbing cream. Which is worse -- being her or being me? OW. Me. At times like this it's good to have some poetry memorized. 'Twas brillig and the ... the ... Dammit. HOW BIG IS MY VAGINA? She could have mowed the back 40 by now. God, how come nobody told me this shit was growing halfway down my leg? Did I water the clematis last night? Next time: vodka first. Next time: Vicodin first.
oh.
ReplyDeletemy.
gawd.
that was one of the strangest, most annoying yet can't stop watching experiences i've ever had...
and thanks...i'll never be able to look at a condom again without hearing indian music and laughing out loud (which could be very very bad at the wrong moment haha)
Ok, the tune was so catchy I couldn't stop watching it. I totally agree with Biddy that it was a can't stop watching experience. I most enjoyed the "gay people need to wear me too" part with the pencil drawing of the two gay men...I think I will have to bookmark that one and watch it again!
ReplyDeleteGreat. Just great. I have a meeting at my daughter's school in twenty minutes and I am going to be humming to condom song now!
ReplyDelete