What I was thinking about at 2:17 this morning:

Douche patrol

2:17-- WTF? Why is the neighbor's car alarm going off?
2:20-- Seriously, WTF?
2:21-- What can I wear tomorrow that will allow me to sleep until 4 minutes before I have to be at work?
2:22-- Are my children really aliens?
2:35-- DUDE, WTF WITH THE CAR ALARM? THIS ISN'T PHILLY.
2:35-- I think the lamppost in the front yard is a symbol of everything I've always wanted.
2:37-- What can I do with the puff pastry in the freezer?
2:37-- Am I a bandwagon fan if I like Elizabeth Peyton?
2:38-- Has any car alarm in history actually stopped an auto theft?
2:39-- I really need a pair of black patent flats.
2:44-- And maybe a pair of burgundy ones.
2:45-- They can't get the alarm to stop.
2:46-- Where is Papi's gun?
2:49-- Why haven't I ever achieved anything in life? Have I always taken the easy way out?
2:50-- What can I eat for lunch tomorrow?
2:53-- What is the French word for sprezzatura?
2:55-- Dude, revving the engine isn't helping; think of something else.
2:55-- Why does Coldplay piss me off so much?
2:57-- If Emmet is sick again tomorrow, can I stay home with him and sleep in?

Comments

  1. Did you write this down at the time, or did you recall it in the morning?!

    This is priceless; kind of a American middle-class James Joyce ( I know I'm assuming things here...)!

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  2. I scribbled it down last night and deciphered it this morning. And I'm pretty sure I'm the type of person Joyce would have satirized.

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  3. OMG you totally made my day! I do this every night at 3 a.m. I was beginning to think I was possessed!

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  4. I think you're absolutely brilliant.
    My thoughts at that same hour last night were not nearly as organized... I hope you got to stay home today!

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  5. My mind races all night long....I really do not think straight until the sun goes down. I need to get that pen and paper to put beside my bed. Great post.

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  6. If you know enough to wonder if you're bandwagon for liking Elizabeth Peyton than you're not bandwagon for liking her.

    But you're cracking me up with the Coldplay comment. I know!

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