Mother's Day Gifts, Part II.I

1. I know a sexy attorney-turned-full-time-MILF who needs this Canon digital camera for Mother's Day, so she can take pictures for her blog of her children. Amazon has a good price on it right now.
2. I know another hot mama who is embarking on a very promising writing career. I assume that she already has the basics: a copy of Bird by Bird, and some beautiful office supplies. She needs a gift of a writing workshop, as soon as the nonfiction or memoirs class is offered again. In the meantime she needs something from here. If she's feeling all unemployed and schlubby, wandering around in jeans and flip-flops all the time, Sephora is the antidote.

Comments

  1. SGMMay 8, 2008 at 2:16 PM

    You clever, clever Mamacita! I do indeed want this, in addition to some peace and quiet.

    ReplyDelete
  2. SGMMay 8, 2008 at 11:36 PM

    p.s. love love LOVE the new header.

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Be Awesome for Halloween

Image
You are a total hoser if you don’t dress up for Halloween. Granted, I haven’t dressed up in a few years, but I am about to change that this year. I have an idea … but it’s a surprise! Actually, I have lots of Halloween ideas. I’ve put together a few sample ideas for some of my favorite bloggers. If you find yourself in need of inspiration, send me a link to your blog, or just describe what you’re doing on Halloween night, and I’ll give you a hand. Emily and Rob : Alice and Ralph Kramden ! Soletrain : ODB . Wouldn’t you pay money to see Uncle John wearing a grill? Anyway, I’m sure he already has the outfit. He just needs to accessorize with a 40. Bunny Tomerlin : Goth princess . Because I bet she’s never even worn PVC. (Polyvore set via Haley ) Grosgrain Garage : preppy Jesus – Bonnanos, tunic with gingham trim and a ribbon belt, pearls worn as a thorny crown Megan: Now that she's succumbed to making wreaths , Mega...
Read more

The Bikini Wax: An Internal Dialogue

God, this is horrifying. I wonder if she's as embarrassed as I am. OW! Ow MOTHERFUCKER! Okay, this hurts less than childbirth, but only because it doesn't last as long. What is she saying? I wish I spoke Vietnamese. I think I outweigh the entire staff combined. Dude, where is she going? They need a picture on this ceiling. They would probably put up a picture of Hannah Montana. I will not think about Miley Cyrus. I will not think about Miley Cyrus. Hey, I bet my nails are dry. I wonder if the liquor store next door sells ice. Next time I'm paying more for a place with numbing cream. Which is worse -- being her or being me? OW. Me. At times like this it's good to have some poetry memorized. 'Twas brillig and the ... the ... Dammit. HOW BIG IS MY VAGINA? She could have mowed the back 40 by now. God, how come nobody told me this shit was growing halfway down my leg? Did I water the clematis last night? Next time: vodka first. Next time: Vicodin first.
Read more